Gordon Ramsay launches new restaurant inspired by BHS school lunch

Disclaimer: This story is written for April Fools Day. All quotes and information are fake and purely for entertainment. Please do not take any of this seriously. Ok? Ok.

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DtBHS’ Michael Kors Cafe made an appearance on Gordon Ramsay’s iconic restaurant rating show Kitchen Nightmares on March 31. Ramsay entered the school at 11:35 am, just on time for first lunch. He came accompanied by a video crew and flashes from paparazzi cameras could be seen outside. 

“Holy smokes,” said Ronald Wilkins ’23. “I am Ramsay’s biggest fan; all I want is for him to call me an idiot sandwich– I would simply die.” 

An argument broke out when Ramsay was informed that he was only able to get one main course. 

“This is f**&&O@!#@*&#›°·&!” Ramsay said. 

After the fiasco, everyone in the cafeteria held their breath as Ramsay carefully added one and a half ketchup packets to the top of his meal, then with his plastic knife and fork, sawed-off his first bite of chicken nuggets.

“This is %^!%&*^(&*$&*(!&!(+(*^+ amazing,” Ramsay said. “Never in my life… all of the contrasting flavors…unbelievable.”

The following week, Principal McBride received a letter from Ramsay himself. It contained a request for approval of a new chain of fast-food restaurants with 634 locations across the country. The restaurants will be named the “Michael Kors Cafe” and will change their menus daily based on DtBHS’ menu. 

“School lunch food is trending,” Ramsay said. “Who would’ve thought that frozen chicken nuggets would have caused this much of a stir, but wow are they amazing.”

Ms. McBride is happy to report that since she has signed, BHS has made around 200 million dollars. She hopes it will go to improve the DtBHS campus, as it is now a national landmark.